ACME Complaint File 1013

by Ursula

[Story Headers]

Dear ACME Products

Having had your products recommended by a good friend of mine, Mr. Lindsey McDonald, I am severely disappointed by your services.

To whit:

On September 7 of 2008, I purchased a replacement left arm from your company. I expected to have normal and usual performance of said arm.

Instead, I find that my left arm and the hand thereof will not perform any useful tasks. My left hand will not do anything except to jerk off incessantly.

As a result my employers have terminated me from my work. If I did not have exceptional reflexes, said termination would have resulted in permanent unemployment except as a corpse.

This sad situation has resulted in my residence with the unwilling donor of my arm, Mr. Fox Mulder. I have not slept for two weeks as a result and I may never be able to sit normally again.

I have retained the services of my friend, Lindsey McDonald, despite his former employment with your subsidiary, Wolfram and Hart.

I am asking, a functioning left arm, return of the malfunctioning arm to its former owner, Mr. Fox Mulder, and ten million dollars for lost income and human suffering.


Alex Krycek, Esquire


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Title:  ACME Complaint File 1013
Author:  Ursula   [email/website]
Details:  Standalone  |  PG-13  |  1k  |  01/26/09
Pairings:  Mulder/Krycek
Category:  Humor, Crossover  |  Angel
Summary:  Krycek has a problem with ACME.

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